My Name is David
by Prissy and Bregan
Summary: My name is David and this is my story.
1. Prologue

"Happy families are all alike, every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way,"

That sums up my family. We aren't really supremely happy or unhappy, but every day, there's always a different problem to tackle. Sometimes it's trying to decide whether to go to Savannah's ballet recital or to Charlie's soccer game. More often than not, it's something deeper, more life changing for a close family member or friend. Once in a while, it involves me.

This particular week, my brother Simon officially got divorced from his wife of several years, Cecilia. The problem is that Simon and Cecilia both want custody over their son, Andrew and are unwilling to share. I guess I would understand Simon not wanting to share if my wife had cheated on me for five months with some French dude named Paolo.

So my dad is currently trying to fan the smoke away and help soothe both parties. He and Mom are more worried about Andrew than either Simon or Cecilia. You see, Andrew isn't a normal five year old little boy. He's special in that he has a disease called spina bifida and has to use crutches or a leg brace to walk around. Everyone likes to call him "Little Forrest Gump," because Andrew, quite honestly looks a lot like Forrest Gump with the leg braces. So you can see why this is a sort of life changing problem that has everyone throwing in their opinion, because the Camden house is not known for silence. Well, that problem is the only one everyone knows.

Then there's my sister Mary. She's expecting triplets even though she has four kids with Carlos- Charlie, Jenny, Janie and Freddy. Only, Carlos was just fired from his job and is worried about making ends meet, so he's not going to look forward to three more mouths to feed. I'm not sure if my mom and dad even know about Mary's dilemma, but she's freaking out about it.

That's another life changing problem, because what's most likely going to happen is that Carlos and Mary will move in with the kids until after the triplets are born in which Carlos will have managed to find another job and save enough money. Well that, or Carlos' family in Puerto Rico, and Mom doesn't really want to loose her Mary again. I know this via the little mouth of Freddy, one of my many spies who work for milk and Oreos.

Of course, there's always Lucy to consider. Lucy, who has the _perfect_ marriage with the _perfect _husband-Kevin and their six _perfect _kids, Savannah, Thomas, Topher, Gregory, Monica, and Jacob. Perfect pastor Lucy is working so hard with her kids, particularly her twins who wants to start dating and Savannah who wants to add a few more dance classes to her already full schedule.

Then there's Gregory and Monica's fighting and Jacob crying about how nobody ever wants to play with him. Not to mention her congregation with couples having marital problems and girls wanting to know why they should wait until marriage. It's no wonder that her marriage with Kevin is crumbling. That would fall in gradual life changing if Kevin hadn't chosen this week to start sleeping at a hotel. Of course, I only know, because of Jacob's naivety.

Now, three life changing problems sound like enough, doesn't it? Enough for one week, anyway. But my dad once told me that God gives to you as much as he thinks you can handle. Apparently this wasn't enough for us to handle.

No, God just had to throw in my older brother, Matt, moving back to town with Benji, Brandon, Bryan, Annabel and Sarah to open a practice. They just discovered that Annabel has diabetes and haven't told anyone yet. I only know this, because Bryan doesn't know how to keep secrets just yet, the sweet little six year old.

I know I should be ashamed of using little children for my own devices, but I am using my own money to supply them with cookies and milk. Now there's only two more life changing problems, one from the mouths of Aaron Brewer and Nicky Morgan.

Nicky is the little boy from down the street. More specifically, he is the kid brother of a Mr. Jack A. Morgan. The Jack A. Morgan that my sister Ruthie spent half the year trying to get a date with, just to go out with a different guy. Anyway Mr. Jack A. Morgan (I should stop the full name thing before you bean me over the head, shouldn't I? Last time, I swear.) is coming home for the entire summer, single and still looking for someone "he could really care about". Ruthie is also coming home for the whole summer, fresh off a rebound with some Canadian dude that she just broke up with. This can only mean disaster, with Aaron's little news:

"My daddy's coming home! He's gonna live here with Mr. Reverend Eric and Mrs. Annie! And Daddy's gonna be a baseball coach at your school again! But I can't tell anyone, because it's a secret. Course, you don't count, Mr. David,"

Yes. This is bound to end in some sort of disaster. Then there's Sam, who being the twin brother of, I usually know all his secrets off the bat. Sam's dating three girls at once, and they all know it. He's starting to be painted on as a 'player' a 'pimp' at school, and doesn't really care. Someone that would care though, would be our parents. Especially when they discover that this little arrangement has been that way for five months and Sam is looking into polygamy on the Internet, not to mention a fourth girl. A fourth girl that I'm having mixed feelings for.

So I think it's safe to assume that a nuclear bomb would be the equivalent of my parents if they knew as much as I did. Then there's one more little life changing secret: Mine. I suppose I might as well say it now and get it over with.

My name is David Camden and I am a bisexual.


	2. Annabel's Diabetes

I started liking girls from a young age, along with Sam. We used to throw change on the ground and pick them up while looking up an unsuspecting female's skirt or dress. That was when we were about eight and when my father caught us, he was so angry and shocked at how fast we were growing in immaturity and adolescence.

I got my first kiss from Lilly in the first grade, just before snack break. I had asked, and she complied. We "went out" for about two weeks and than discovered cooties. She's now actually one of Sam's three girlfriends and a very good friend of mine.

As for men, that happened about two weeks ago. I know for sure, that I'm not gay, or what some people call a sex addict. I don't want a boyfriend or a girlfriend at the same time, but they both have their pros and cons. As for the recent interest in batting for both sides?

It started when Sam brought home an openly gay friend, Shooter. Shooter had these blond highlights and an almost too tight green shirt. He took one glance at me, grinned and said,

"Sam, any chance your brother's gay and single?"

Sam answer?

"I don't know. David doesn't really date dudes, but if he liked guys, they would have to have red hair. He likes red heads."

That's not actually true. Just all the girls I've asked out had red hair, Brittany, Ashley, Lilly (Her hair is now a shocking electric blue, and don't get me started on her piercings), Meg, and Corrine. Anyway, moving along. Shooter laughed and said,

"David, huh? I'm Shooter Gunn," He held out his hand and I took it, surprised at its softness. I was even more shocked when Shooter pulls me in and kisses me fairly quickly. Worse, I enjoyed it. It was pretty fast, because Sam threw him off of me, saying,

"Sorry Davie, Shoot's had a little too much coffee. Won't happen again," Sam gave an uneasy laugh and I sort of wobbled back upstairs. I know I like men, but I don't like Shooter. He's a bit too...cowboyish for me. I guess what Sam stated is true. I really do prefer redheads. And George Clooney. That man is just so...perfect.

I think Sam knows. I sort of confessed it to him and he just laughed,

"I know, Davie. You've been checking everyone out since we were ten. I always thought it was because of that movie we watched behind Mom and Dad's back. What was it again?" He furrowed his eyebrows

"Brokeback Mountain?" I asked, remembering that movie vaguely, one part in particular and those of you familiar with that scene will know which one it is. Ah, the wonders of Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal.

"Oh yeah," Sam laughed and checked his watch, "Shoot I'm late. I'm going to the movies with Mandy and Lilly. Cherie would be coming too, but she has to baby sit Jacques and Henri," He sighed, "I was looking forward to hanging out with all of them for a night,"

"Except Little Miss Newbie who has no idea of your current relationship with these three girls, nor that your parents think that they are just little friends,"

"Hey, I like Keegan, but she's different. I feel something-" Sam frowned, "Something different with her, but I like that feeling I have with the other girls too. Plus Keegan's totally against polygamy. She said that her grandfather practiced it and her father ran away to Ohio. They just moved here-a family of three,"

I sighed. Keegan Charlottes, I had seen at school. She was usually sitting at a table reading a book, like _Catch-22 _or _A Catcher in the Rye. _No way was she Sam's type. Probably the feeling was just Sam's brain hurting from all the smart radiating from Keegan. We shared a class together, and she had a loudmouth quality to her, always eager to answer a question, but in the hallways, she was unapproachable. What had attracted my 'playa' twin to her, I have no idea.

She had red hair. Usually it was up in some sort of knot and her hair clips were very cute, especially the glittery butterfly ones she likes to wear whenever we have a mock debate day. Perhaps the hair accessories she wears attracted Sam to her.

Oh good. Just add that to my problems. I'm in love with men and my brother's prospective fourth girlfriend, who thinks I'm an ass for some reason. Apparently, it all began when Keegan and her parents came to our church service on Sunday. It had been a really hot day of summer and sweat was plastered all over my face, my hair wet purely from perspiration.

Mom had made me and Sam stand by Dad and help move people along. I had apparently 'manhandled' her with my 'sticky ape fingers' and my 'B.O wasn't all that great'. She did look cute in that white dress, the sweat causing-STOP IT! Stop thinking about it, David!

"Uncle David?" That was Bryan, Matt's youngest. I yelled that he could come in and saw that Nicky was with him.

"What's up, little men?" I asked, grinning, standing up a little straighter from my bed which I've been telling you this tale.

"Daddy and Mommy dropped me and Annabel off. Benji and Brandon are doing football," Bryan explained, and I thought that his hair, which he wanted to the shoulders, like Matt's, was getting worse, because his was just too curly. Sort of like Ruthie's when she was five. Nicky had a more appropriate haircut, cut military style. His father was some admiral in Annapolis or something, but his mom had full custody of him.

"What's up?" I asked, "Want some Oreos and milk?" I opened the little refrigerator that Sam and I saved up for and bought when we figured out secrets didn't make us sick. I knew Sam used it on Ruthie and the 'big kids' but I preferred naive little kids who withheld nothing for an Oreo, like Dad. Speaking of Dad, he still hasn't gotten around to tell Mom that his ring's a fake. We were seven when we discovered that secret. At least, I don't _think_ he's told Mom.

Nicky hopped up on my bed, and Bryan followed, seeing it was okay to get crumbs on the sheets. He's been hard up for Oreos since Sarah wiped their entire house clean of anything not resembling a carrot. He, Benji, Brandon, and Matt have been eating double helpings of Mom's dessert whenever Sarah or Annabel aren't there. Mom's starting to think that Sarah is scared about Annabel gaining weight, because of a mishap when Annie gave her namesake some some popcorn, sweetened with caramel. Sarah practically dived for the kernel headed toward her daughter's unsuspecting mouth. Annabel still doesn't want anyone to know about her diabetes, and her parents are deciding to wait until after Andrew's problem is resolved.

All of a sudden, Annabel came in, looking for Bryan, I assume. Her brother quickly hid his Oreo, looking ashamed, and Nicky followed suit, along with me. I smiled and held out my hands,

"If it isn't my favorite bell!" I joked, "Give Uncle David a hug," She laughed and hugged me,

"Want some milk? And sugarless cookies?" I asked, pulling out the sugarfree ones I bought two days ago, "Bry and Nicks were just about to have some as well,"

Annabel looked at me, surprised, "Did Bryan tell you?"

"Tell me what?" I asked, "Here, have a cookie and some milk. It won't kill you, like these fattening Oreos. I've been meaning to lay off the sugar," I patted my stomach and she laughed.

I love it when Annabel laughs. Her eyes crinkle up and her cheeks flush a rosy pink, not to mention her button nose. The other Camden girls do have that same laugh, but a different sort of sound to it. Annabel's is by far, the sweetest, with a sound like a tinkling of a bell. Sarah says thats why they named her Annabel Ruthie instead of Annie-Beth Ruthie like they had originally planned. Her Annabel had made that sound when Sarah was holding her.

"Promise you won't tell?" She asked, taking a cookie from me

I smiled, "Cross my heart, kiddo. Now, who wants to hear the story about Simon's slow car chase?" I didn't remember it too well, but Ruthie told it so many times to them, and it had become one of their favorites, when Simon was not in attendance. He didn't understand that these kids thought he was _cool _for being in a car chase, regardless of the circumstances.

Cecilia liked the story too, along with Little Forrest Gump. I knew Andrew often requested that one, along with the story about Happy's arrival into the family at bedtime. Simon really did love his son, though, and had always wanted more, but Cecilia was afraid that the next one would have spina bifida as well. Just because three people in our family had it, doesn't mean it was Simon's fault. The disease has yet to be determined as hereditary anyway.

Cecilia however, did want a little girl. From the gist of it, she got Paolo to have an affair with her at his place for about five months before getting pregnant. Than she quickly slept with Simon to make him less suspicious. Cecilia had never counted on Paolo finding out from Simon's mother, when she was in labor and coming straight to the hospital, yelling at her.

Simon had been holding a girl they were planning on naming Ruth Annie Camden. Finding out that he was not the rightful father, Simon told Cecilia to name her Isabella Margot, like she wanted and left-with Andrew. Mom just said "I told you so," to Dad and they both started fretting over Andrew.

Cecilia did change the little baby's name, but to Simone Ruth-last name yet to be determined. From what I hear, she's a happy healthy little girl. The little girl Cecilia had always wanted-with Simon.

"Where's everyone?" Nicky asked, biting into another Oreo. He hadn't liked Annabel's cookies. Bryan didn't seem to like them much either, but was eating them for his big sister's sake.

"Grandpa's at the hospital visiting sick patients. Grandma is with Ruthie, Lucy, and her kids at some church thing. Simon's at work. Sam is out with his friends at the movies and I'm guessing I'm babysitting?" I asked

They smiled, and the doorbell rang. I frowned, I knew where everyone was. And no one rang the bell anyway.

It was Keegan. She laughed, noticing that Nicky was behind my back, Bryan was clinging on my leg and Annabel was looking at her from my side.

"I like your hair," Annabel said, in her brash tone. That voice-er _quality_ was a constant pain for her teachers, but her parents felt it was good to let her be outspoken and ignored the hand raising policy.

"Oh!" Keegan touched her hair self consciously, and laughed, "Thank you," Her hair did look pretty, left down and cascading like a waterfall. The sun hitting her red hair just right made her into something of a goddess.

"Looking for Sam?" I asked, pulling Bryan out of the way, "He's not here,"

Keegan sighed, "No actually. I was looking for someone else," She looked at me smiling sadly, "Can we talk?"

"I have to watch the monkeys and Annabel," I explain and noticing the look of slight distress on her face, I sighed and told Annabel to watch the boys while I talked to Keegan in the kitchen.

"I can't guarantee you privacy," I warned her, "But these kids only tell me all the things they overhear, so don't worry,"

Keegan sighed, "Is Sam a-" She glanced at the hallway and mouthed 'pimp?'.

I think I looked at her for a few seconds in shock, wondering how on earth she figured it out. Most of the stuff about Sam dating are just rumors. None of his girlfriends have ever told anyone outside their little circle they're dating him. I'm just waiting for one of the girls to pull a _John Tucker Must Die _on him.

She blushed, "Idiotic, right? I figured you'd know, because you're his twin,"

"He is!" I blurted out and groaned, taking a seat at the counter, next to Keegan. Other kids had asked me, but I'd always laugh them off. It was harder to give Keegan a lie, even by omission, "Sam's at the movies with two of his friends," I kept my wording safe too, darting my eyes at the hallway. I could hear Annabel, "How'd you figure it out?"

"I saw him at the movies, holding hands with one girl the other on his lap. It may have been dark, but I know his voice." Keegan explained, "Kinda sealed the deal when one girl traded spots with the lap girl, and did things not allowed on a PG movie like the one I was watching. Bambi will never be the same." Keegan laughed weakly, "Came here as soon as I could to confirm,"

"I'm sorry," I said, patting her on the back, "Sam doesn't deserve you, let alone more of you,"

"You know these girls?" She asked, looking at me. I laughed

"Odd history. Lilly, the uh second lap girl, I'm sure, was the first girl I've kissed. She's a bit wild. Mandy I met when I was fourteen, during a game of Seven Minutes In Heaven. She was the first girl that I got to second base with in the closet," I laughed, "Cherie, his latest, was the first girl I Frenched, like about a year ago,"

"So, these girls all dumped you for Sam?" Keegan asked, "I don't see why. You're clearly smarter than him, not to mention how cute you look when your hair's curly," Keegan blushed at that and looked down.

I laughed, and it came out strangled, because my throat was so dry. She looked at me in alarm and I turned a deep cherry red. Attractive, I'm sure.

"You know, uh," I looked at her, "I think-I think uh-"

"Yes?" Keegan came closer, holding my hands, smiling

I wanted so badly to tell her how I felt about her, but stupid Sam with that stupid thing about a different feeling! What if Sam was Keegan's soul mate, like Dad is Mom's and vice versa? I'm screwing up a chance for my brother to date someone that could actually be good for him.

He's been caught (by me) drinking beer, smoking both cigarettes and pot, going a little too far with one of his girlfriends, and I'm almost positive I caught him buying heroin from someone off the street. I haven't the heart to guilt him out to Mom and Dad, though. Besides I've managed to keep him pretty much sober for seventeen years and hopefully he won't be as dumb in the future.

Despite Sam's lesser qualities, of which there are many to justify Keegan to go out with the 'cuter twin', I was still his twin above all. We had fought over a girl when we were six and swore never to do it again. Well, we had fought more over Dad then the girl in question.

"I think that you should go," I mumbled, sighing, "And, you should confront Sam. He won't lie point-blank, except to our parents and siblings,"

Keegan nodded sadly and pecked me on the cheek, "Thank you David, for everything," She dropped my hands and left through the kitchen. I sat on the stool, in shock and the three kids filed in, not saying a word.

"We heard a lot," Nicky confessed

"Nicky, go home," I said tiredly, "I'll walk you and than I'm going to take Bryan and Annabel's to church where Grandma can watch you two. I just need to be alone for a while," I sighed

"Fine," Nicky said, "I think my dad's home,"

"Good, good," I said absently, putting Annabel's coat on her-inside out. She fixed it and we headed out for a nice leisurely walk, after they pulled me in the right direction toward Nicky's house.

I knocked on the door, stuffing my hands in my pocket. A red headed kid about my age and his older brother, I assume opened the door.

"Nicky?" The red head asked, "I thought you were in your room?"

"That's my brother Cain, and that's Jack," Nicky explaining, pointing them out.

"David Camden," I said, smiling, "My folks live three houses down and my sister's next door, plus my brothers' place a block away,"

"They have seven kids," Nicky said, and to me, he stated proudly, "My family has nine kids. I'm number six,"

Jack shook my hand and frowned, "Camden as in...Ruthie Camden? I heard from someone she was back,"

"Just for the summer," I explained, "Ruthie's at church with the womenfolk and I was just dropping off Nicky before I take Bryan and Annabel there,"

"I'll come," Jack said, grinning

"Me too," Cain added, frowning, "Nicky stay here and help Mom watch the triplets,"

"Triplets?" Annabel asked. She's a sucker for babies, particularly identical looking babies. It's nice to be at that age where all the medical risks for having multiple births haven't exactly hit or how one gets triplets. Then again, my parents-well Dad told Sam and I about the 'birds and bees' when he caught us looking up girl's skirts. I don't think Mom even knows about that.

"Yeah," Nicky said, "They're the only girls in my family, 'cept Mom. Molly cries a lot, Maggie likes to walk around with her head on the floor, and May has a stink bomb so bad that we hafta wear gas masks,"

"How eloquent," Cain said sarcastically, "Go watch your little sisters. Dad'll be home soon with Oliver, Lukas, and Ephram," He shoved Cain through the entrance and stepped out with Jack, shutting the door, grinning, "Mind if we ride with you?"

"Nah," I said, thinking about how nice Cain's hair looked. It wasn't like Keegan's dark red hair, always perfectly controlled by hair appliances and looked so smooth. Cain's was a bright orange that was on the verge of clashing with a red or orange sweater. The curls and bed head look to it only enhanced it, and I couldn't help noticing some well defined abs through his shirt. No wonder Ruthie had been desperate for a date with his brother. Jack was handsome as well, if not too old for me.

Speaking of Jack, am I really doing the right thing, exposing him to Ruthie, so soon after a break up with Tad or Thad or whatever the "bugger's" name was. Stupid Brit ravishing my sister and robbing her house after in the wee hours of morning. Then again, he was a nice guy and Ruthie needs a nice guy more than she needs a romantic British "bloke" with an affinity for stealing cheap vases from Pier 1.

I put Bryan in his little car seat. He doesn't really need one anymore, being 6 years old, but he refuses to get in the car without it. Matt likes to tell stories about how stubborn Bryan was, refusing to be potty trained until last year and playing only with certain toys, like Commander 16 and Malibu Stacey. (It was actually the boys' present to who they thought was going to be their sister-Baby Brianna.) Annabel sits next to him and I hand Jack the keys. I don't think I can drive in the shape I am.

Cain takes shotgun and starts fiddling with the radio. As it's Dad's car, it has Christian rock presets, so it takes Cain a few minutes to get off the presets and find a song that he could head bang to, with censors, of course. Bryan, I don't think he even knows what the BEEP means. However, he knows Eminem quite well and likes to beep-beep along with him. Matt and Sarah as a result of discovering their son's knowledge of censored Eminem music via Uncle Sam, got Annie and Eric to ground him for a week. Didn't stop Bryan from letting Sam dress him up as P-Diddy for Halloween.

"Man, you must be religious, David," Cain commented, "I've never heard a radio with so many Christian rock stations,"

"I'm not," I said, "This is my father's car. He's the minister at the church,"

"Grandpa's a good minister!" Annabel added, wanting to be included in the 'big kid's conversation'.

"Minister huh?" Cain asked, "How does he feel about people are homosexuals?"

"If they're a sniper or a Jesus Loves Me afficinado, not too kindly," I said, a poor attempt at a joke, "Dad says that God accepts us all for who we are, what choices we make, and how we live our life,"

"What's a homosexual?" Annabel asked

"Uh-" I scratched my ear, "What's your friend's name? Katie-Karrisa-Kitty?"

"Klara," Annabel corrected me

"Well, Klara has two mommies right?" Annabel nodded

"When there's two mommies or two daddies, they are called homosexuals. If it's one mommy and one daddy, than it is called heterosexual. Then there's me," I sighed, deciding just to get it over with and tell Bryan and Annabel. I knew they wouldn't tell anyone else.

"What are you?" Bryan asked, leaning toward me.

"I'm called a bisexual. Thats when uh-" I frowned, "A daddy likes mommies and other daddies, but not always at the same time,"

"What am I?" Annabel asked. They didn't seem dazed at me being a bisexual.

"That's your choice, Bell," I poked her nose

Cain piped up, "David, have you come out yet? Of the closet so to speak?"

"Nah, there's all this other stuff going on," I spotted the church and began to unbuckle Bryan. It was a pain to park, open his door, wrestle with the seatbelt for five minutes and pull out a very heavy six year old. Well not that heavy, but still, 55 pounds is a lot!

Jack handed me the keys and walked into the church, intent on finding a certain sister of mine. Cain on the other hand, helped me get Bryan and Annabel into the church with minimal fussing, protests, or tantrums. As soon as Bryan spotted Thomas, he ran off, and Annabel did the same, seeing her beloved Grandma.

"So," Cain stood next to me, scanning the office with a mess of kids and women gathered around playing various board games. "What is this?"

"A bonding thing that Mom likes to do to help keep the community close. Most of these girls are from the halfway house she's in charge of and their kids as well. Mom doesn't like saying good bye so she tries to stay in contact, through checkers and Scrabble,"

"Huh," Cain said, "What was the problem?"

"Let's go somewhere quieter," I said, moving to the church with him. I think I saw Ruthie talking to Jack in the corner, but I can't be too sure. I ended up where my family usually sits on Sundays and felt wrong there, so I moved to the opposite row. Felt easier there, not as many memories assaulting me. Cain sits next to me, and threads his fingers into mine. I smile.

"My nephew has spina bifida as well in a very ugly custody battle between my brother and his wife who cheated on him with another man for five months. My brother's been sleeping in his old room for the last few months while I've been bunking with my twin brother,"

"Wow, that is a pickle," Cain admitted, and I chuckle at his use of the word 'pickle' as opposed to something like 'problem', 'ordeal' or something like that.

"That's not all. Not even close," I said, in my bitter tone, "You know Annabel?" I pointed in the general vincinity of the office, "She has juvenile diabetes and Bryan has to eat this sugarless crap in front of her, because Sarah doesn't want her kids to be treated differently. That's why I always stuff him with Oreos at my place when she isn't looking,"

"David, I don't know," Cain sighed, "All these medical problems,"

"The worse part is that my family has no idea about Annabel's medical problems. She's very secretive of it. And there are at least five other secrets, one including your brother," I cocked my head to where he was

"What about Jack?" Cain asked, frowning

"When he was like our age," I said, "My sister Ruthie, who was two years younger than he, tried for the entire year to get him to go out with her. They didn't, because they both agreed that Ruthie wasn't where Jack was in maturity. And she was in love with Martin, you know? Coach Martin?"

Cain nodded, "And you think that Jack is going to try and go out with Ruthie again,"

"Martin too," I added heavily, "He had a baby with another girl instead of dating Ruthie, like she had wanted. Now though, he's single and my mother is walking around in a daze humming 'Here Comes the Bride',"

Cain chuckled, "I think it'll just be a rebound for my brother. He just broke up with some girl,"

"That was the rebound girl," I corrected him, smiling, "Crystal was the long time girl, Mona his rebound, and now if he asks Ruthie out, it's 50-50,"

Cain looked at me, "How do you know that?"

"Nicky is a big fan of cookies and milk, if you get what I mean," I smiled, "Didn't know you were gay though," I looked at him, "You are gay, right?"

"If I wasn't," Cain grinned, "Would I do this?" He kissed me softly on the lips and pulled away before I had a chance to protest. Fireworks.

"Damn," I mumbled and we both laughed, "I don't think I've ever been kissed in a church,"

"Same here," Cain admitted, smiling, "And uh, the bi thing isn't really a problem for me, David, but you should tell your family,"

"I told my twin, Bryan, and Annabel. That's enough for now," I said, sighing, "Let me tell you the other secrets," I looked at him, and he was about to protest,

"David, you don't have to-"

"I want to," I took his hand and smiled. The secrets came pouring out and a short hour later, I was free. Or at least, I felt freed. Cain smiled, he hadn't blinked an eye. Not even during the more gruesome secrets.

"David, here's my secret," He said softly, looking at me, "I like you...A lot,"

I laughed and nodded my agreement. Slowly, as if we were in some cheap two-bit romantic comedy that's been done at a particular angle to death, we leaned toward each other and were about to have our lips touching the other. However, my mother chose that moment to find me and shout,

"David! We're going!"

Jack showed up again, as well, and I could see faint lipstick marks on his neck and mouth. It was no wonder that the women were looking at him, and giggling. Cain dropped my hand and smiled,

"Will you come to church tomorrow?" I blurted out and he smiled, nodding. Jack however, heard, and added,

"I'll come too, Ruthie invited me,"

I glared at him, and Cain did as well. Cain. Cain Morgan. That sounds so perfect. Cain Morgan Camden. David Morgan Camden. Or vice versa. It doesn't really matter to me. Then again, there is Keegan. She isn't meant for me though in any way, but lust, I'm starting to think.

Maybe I'm just a homosexual, who just had his last fanasty with a woman in them.

Yeah right. (insert laughing here)


	3. The Wrath of Annie

I took the driver's seat and Jack sat next to me. He glanced at Cain and myself and asked,

"Is there something going on between you two?" I could see him either grinning or smirking

"Yeah," I said, and Cain followed, happy to know he could at least tell someone other than me that we were dating.

"We have a date tomorrow, not that that's any of your business, Jack," Cain said, "But what's this I hear about you and Ruthie?"

"What about me and Ruthie?" Jack asked

"Hello?" I asked, inserting myself in the conversation, "Have you seen your face? And there's a hickey on your neck,"

"Nice place to make out, a church," Cain said, teasing, "David and I were more prudish,"

"That's probably because you were right in front of God. It's hard to think about anything related to making out with that large cross just staring at you," Jack shuddered and Cain frowned,

"That's our church, not David's!"

"Fine fine," Jack looked at me, "David Camden, right?"

"Yes sir," I said, grinning

"I knew you when you were seven. You have a twin don't you?" Jack asked, smiling

"Sam," I filled in for him, smiling, "He's at the movies with two friends,"

"Yeah, you guys were always riding around on your bikes," Jack chuckled, "Ruthie bragged to me once that it was she who taught you how to bike," He frowned, "I have no idea how I remember that,"

It was actually Cecilia, but he didn't need to know that.

I pulled up to their driveway and put it in park. Jack said simply, "Well, any Camden is a good fellow, so you can date my brother. You seem better than the last guy he went out with, at any rate."

"I'll tell you about him over the phone," Cain promised me, and we both grabbed each other's hand and held it tightly for a few seconds before he left.

My cell rang just as I was pulling out. I answered it of course, seeing that the caller ID was flashing DAD.

"Dad?" I asked, frowning

"David!" Dad said, "Where have you been? I've been trying to call for an hour!"

"Church, and Sam's at the movies," I explained, bewildered, "What's up?"

"Matt had an emergency come up at the hospital. One of his obese patients came into labor a month early, so he's going to have to perform a C-section. Anyway, he left Bryan and Annabel at the house. Apparently Nicky was there, and he assumed someone was home. However, he's there right now, trying to find Bryan and Annabel,"

"They're with Grandma. She said she was going to give them a ride home," I explained, "Relax Dad, I just gave them some cookies and milk. Sugarless ones for Annabel of course," I realized what I said and made a 'oops' face. Jack pulled into their driveway and I had to get out.

Cain hugged me and we smiled at each other.

"David," Dad had his warning voice on, "Why is Annabel eating sugarless cookies? Is your mother right?"

He walked away with his brother and I took the front seat of the car, grinning.

"I have to go, Dad," I said and hung up, dialing the hospital. I pulled out of their driveway, going toward our house.

"Dr. Camden speaking," Matt said,

"It's David," I said,

"Where are you?" Matt asked, frowning, "Oh there they are! Mom just pulled in,"

I was halfway there, not wanting Mom to catch me. I knew that Matt could easily evade her, with the urgent hospital page, though.

"That's good. Mom was driving your kids home," I said, "But I might've let it slip that I gave Annabel sugarless cookies. Dad's probably telling Mom right now and, soon far fetched theories will come. Just tell them the truth,"

"That's Annabel's choice to make," Matt said, "Apparently, she confided in you?"

"No, Bryan did. As far as Annabel knows, I'm as clueless as the rest of the family and a bit on the chubby side from eating too many sugar cookies,"

"Hang on, David, I have another call," Matt said and I ended up getting called again too.

"David Camden!" Annie yelled at me over the phone, and said in her scary hissing voice, "What you do know?"

"Nothing, Mom," I said cheerfully, "It's not my secret. I have to go, I'm talking to Matt,"

"Fine," She hung up and I chuckled, I was standing in front of the house now, in park. For now though, I was just going to sit there and wait for Matt to get back to me.

"David, you're blocking me in," Matt said, when he came back on the line. I saw him and he was sure enough trying to get out of the driveway. He gave me a sarcastic smile and motioned for me to move.

I sighed and pulled out, parking now on the street. Mom hates it when I park on the street.

"Happy?" I asked, "I was just ambushed by our mother!"

"Hey, I just had to talk to our mother in person and she's mad. Then I had to talk to Sarah, who's mad at you and me, because she thinks I told you. Then Dad came by, trying to be all 'Cool Dad' and find out." Matt laughed, "Good luck, David, and I hope you won't say a word. For Annabel's sake,"

"You and me, brother. Oh and Sam knows too," I said and hung up before he could reply. I turned my phone off for good measure and looked at the house. Mom was leaning against the doorpost, arm crossed, with the territorial grandma look in her face.

I walked to the door, feeling like Judas Iscariot when he realized the shit was going to hit the fan. In the corner of my eye, I saw our car-the one that Sam and I share. We bought it for 500 bucks at a used car place and spent the entire summer fixing it up. It's a gorgeous piece of art, really.

Sam parked in the driveway and jumped out, smiling. He had a good date, it seemed. On seeing Mom Sam stopped,

"Whoa, did Mom find out about Mary or something?" He asked and I shook my head telling him to not to go any further.

"What about Mary?" Mom asked, frowning, "She has been acting oddly. What do you two know?"

"Nothing," We said now having each other for support. Sam and I discovered that we can lie more efficiently together.

"So, Sam honey, isn't it sad about Annabel?" Annie asked, "Sarah just told me,"

I gaped inwardly. My mother was a devious person and could lie with the best of them.

"Horrible," Sam admitted, "Annabel really wanted to go to that basketball camp. It's a shame there were no more spaces left,"

Now I was gaping more at Sam. He was the best liar I knew. And the camp thing was actually true! A liar who told the truth in lies, amazing. Mom narrowed her eyes and stomped into the house, much like Savannah does when Kevin forbids her from going to a concert.

"How'd you know?" I asked, when I was sure we were alone.

"She never calls me 'Sam honey' without wanting to know something that she doesn't already know," Sam explained, "She does the same with you, like David dear, or David darling, oh and-"

"Pumpkin," we said at the same time and laughed, high fiving each other before coming in and shutting the door.

"I give her props for lying so effectively though," Sam said and pulled a soda out of the refrigerator,  
"Who knew she had it it her?"

"Yeah," I admitted, "I accidentally let it slip to Dad that I gave Annabel sugarless cookies,"

"Sarah and Matt must be mad," Sam laughed

"Not as mad as Mary will be," I reminded him, "Remember last time, when she smacked us in the back of our heads?"

"With her ring hand," Sam rubbed his head, shuddering.

"Why did you say Mary?" I asked, "Why not Martin? It's not really a secret anyway! They would find out he's coming home in three days!"

"I thought that Mom could tell if one of her daughters were pregnant!" Sam yelled back at me, forgetting we were in Mom-territory. You have to watch what you say in the kitchen.

Mom walked-well _ran_ down from the stairs, and stood right up to us, "Mary's pregnant?" She sounded like a mother lion trying to protect her young and suddenly her twins were excluded from her babies.

"I don't know," Sam said, weakly, "Are you eavesdropping?" He elbowed me into action. Mom's face was a thing to behold, silencing greater men then us.

"Yeah Mom?" I added, trying to smile, "Eavesdropping isn't a good thing, you know,"

Mom wasn't listening. At this moment, Sam and I were merely little pieces of mold that refused to be scraped off the counter.

"But Carlos lost his job," She said worriedly, "How will Mary work, raise her family, and a baby?"

"He found another job," Sam said and I smacked my hand over his mouth, "Carlos and Mary have some news to tell the family tomorrow night," I said, giving her a pretend smile.

"And Martin's coming home?" Annie asked, even more gleeful

"I don't know," I said this time, "Were you listening to our private conversation, Mom?"

"It was an emergency, and I will-" She glared at both of us individually for effect, "Find all your secrets one way or another," She left and Sam groaned

"Mary is definitely going to kill us," I said, taking a sip of Sam's soda, "Why'd you say Carlos found another job?" I added in a hissed voice, "He doesn't even know Mary's pregnant!"

"I didn't want Mom to glare at me again," Sam said, "Geez. Whoever heard of letting a kid have some privacy?"

"Speaking of privacy," I said, "Thank you for barging in on me while I was in the bathroom,"

"We're twins," Sam grinned through a mouthful of sandwich, "Mom still shows everyone pictures of us in the tub,"

"Yes, but the door was locked for a reason,"

"Well, I learned how to jerry rig locks for a reason," Sam jumped up on the counter, "I really needed to do the dirty. I shouldn't have had five bean burritos," Sam exhaled and rubbed his stomach, "Speaking of burritos, I gotta go," He lept off and left me to myself.

"What an idiot," I muttered, knowing Sam was probably saying the same thing upstairs. Today wasn't one of my better days.

"Hi David!" Andrew greeted me, walking unsteadily on his braces. They were blue, sort of a plastic cast-like shape. He was a sweet little boy. Mom says that Andrew looks just like Sam and Simon did when they were three, straight blond hair, blue eyed, and of average height. I was on the taller side, like Matt and Mary, with curlier hair, like Ruthie's and our Grandma Jenny's. Andrew is actually five and a half, but physically, he's at the same level as a three year old-with leg braces. The day he started to walk, aged two years, nine months. That was the same date as mine and Sam's birthday.

We had turned fourteen and Dad was letting us have our first boy/girl party-in the yard. The family party was supposed to be about two hours before, but Andrew was crawling around on the carpet. Cecilia was talking about how he had stood up by himself with Simon's help the other day.

All of a sudden, I hear a, "Sama! Dav-ah!" Andrew was supporting himself with both arms on the coffee table. We were sitting opposite of him. As encouragement, though we both knew it wasn't possible for him to do so, Sam and I held our arms out, like we'd do for the other kids and encouraged him toward us.

Imagine a completely hushed room, when Andrew looks right at us, a look I'd never seen in his face for a fleeting second, and he waddles himself, much like a duck. Twice he falls, but he pulls himself back up with the coffee table, this big smile on his face. Next thing, after many falls, he lands in our arms and says,

"Hi Sama, Dav-ah. Happa birtha da" He yawns and crawls in Sam's lap. Everyone started talking at the same time

Due to the life changing experience, the boy/girl party was canceled and we spent the rest of the night trying to get Andrew to walk again, for the tape. Being the cunning little boy he is, he just continued to be asleep. Simon did get a copy though, eventually. We had forgiven Andrew, and planned to ruin his sweet sixteen by egging him or something. For now, 'Forrest Gump' was protected by invisible forces known to me as Mom and Dad.

"Hey kiddo," I greeted, and noticed the mess Sam had made in making his sandwich, "Want a sandwich?" I asked, holding up a slice of bread. I was kind of hungry anyway.

Andrew's eyes lit up and he ran-well his version of a run is a cross between a jog and a skip. He looks even more like a sweet innocent boy when he runs.

"Can I have peanut butter?" He asked, "They prodded my back and shot me again," Andrew made a face. He hated the hospital, and anything related to a hospital. In fact, the last time Matt had tried to hug him, he had screamed bloody murder until Simon took him back. And Matt's just a gynecologist.

"Peanut butter, banana, and the chunky nuts," I told him, smiling, "Sit down, little Forrest. I'll make the food and you pour the milk." I held out two cups of milk and a jug of milk. It was the small kind he could easily lift.

Andrew smiled and eagerly helped me. Being five, he made a mess, but I helped him clean up and forgot the sippy cup top again. Sam and I set a record for forgetting these drink tops when we were forced to pour juice for the under seven crowd. I didn't really care if Andrew would make a mess with the milk at this point. All the sippy cup tops were always missing.

"How's your sister?" I asked him, putting a plate of Oreos in the middle. It was the Double Stuf kind, a Camden favorite. Andrew likes to twist it off and lick the cookies until they were bare. Then he would crumble them into the milk, drinking soggy bits of cookie crumbs. I prefer the old fashioned dunk.

"Mona?" Andrew asked, and he shrugged, "She's boring. She doesn't know how to play Legos or tell any good stories,"

I looked at him for a second. I never knew what it was to be a big brother to someone. With the exception of Sam, but we're so close in age, I don't count the minutes between us. However, having a million nieces and nephews younger then I, taught me, that I was expected to entertain them and not the other way around.

"Andrew, uh," I frowned, "Simone is your baby sister. You're supposed to teach _her_ how to play Legos and tell _her_ stories,"

"I told her the story about the Booger Man that lives under your bed, Uncle David, but Mommy didn't like it. So I showed her my action figures and Mommy made me take these away and play with some dolly with her," Andrew scowled

"Bogeyman," I corrected him, absently. All the kids call him the BoogerMan for some reason. "You aren't allowed to play with your toys in front of her?"

"Mommy's afraid she might swallow a piece," Andrew explained solemnly, "She and Poppa Paolo play with me when Simone's napping,"

"Oh," I said thoughtfully. That made sense. Kevin was afraid that both Savannah and Monica had swallowed his wedding ring. Both were false alarms, but Gregory actually ate Lucy's ring when he was a baby. Lucy didn't know how it had disappeared and had been hiding it from Kevin for several days. It was Kevin who had noticed Lucy's ring in the dirty diaper and it was Kevin who washed it off and placed it on Lucy's nightstand that night. Forty weeks later came Jacob, screaming his way into the world.

Speaking of the screamer, just who should choose to grace us with his presence but one Jacob Nathaniel Kinkirk.

"Cookies?" He asked in a fairly accusatory tone, "Can I have some?" He noticed Andrew and said cheerfully, "Oh hi, Andy!"

"Hello Jake," Andrew greeted him, smiling, "Ask Uncle David,"

"Okay," Jacob turned to me, "Can I have a cookie?" He asked in a slightly nasal voice, the one he uses when he wants something.

"Yes you may," I said handing him an Oreo, "Milk's in the refrigerator, and you know where the cups are, Jake-o,"

"I don't like milk," Jacob made a face and broke his Oreo in half, cramming one in his mouth, the other crammed in his pocket for later. He turned to me, as if remembering something, "Oh, Daddy called earlier and said that he's going to Buffalo for a week with us. Mommy's going to stay here and do boring church stuff,"

"Church isn't boring," My father walked in the kitchen, holding his keys and briefcase. He smiled, seeing Andrew and Jacob with me, more at Andrew I think.

"Hello boys," He smiled, "Who's home?"

"Mom's upstairs with Sam. Bryan and Annabel went home with Matt. I think Lucy's other kids are at their place packing like Jacob _should_ be doing," I said, giving Jacob a slight nudge toward the door. He took the hint and left after hugging his grandfather.

"Daddy's here too," Andrew said, "He's sleeping on the coach, because he and I spent the entire day at the zoo and I wore him out," Andrew looked proud at this, "Want some cookies?" He held up an Oreo.

"Grandma would have my head," He laughed, "I've been having to eat lettuce since the last heart attack," He looked at the door where Jacob had exited again, and asked, "Why does Jacob think church is boring?"

"Believe me, Dad," I said, smiling, "The coolness of a minister wears off very quickly, especially with a cop around. Haven't you noticed Jacob playing Cop with his friends?"

"Kevin isn't a cop," He said, confused

"But he used to be, and well, I'm not Jacob," I ended lamely

"When you were Jacob's age, you and Sam wanted to be baseball players. I asked if you were sure you didn't want to be a minister and you two just said "I'm gonna be a baseball player." Dad smiled fondly at me and I was sure he was thinking of when I was a little kid, before Sam and I become little girl crazy troublemakers.

"Dad?" I asked caution ally after a few minutes. He snapped out of it and smiled, patting my shoulder.

"Oh David, I was just thinking of when this old house had a lot more people," Eric sighed, "I might as well break it to you and Sam. You're graduating this year after all,"

"Dad?" I repeated, bewildered

"I'm going to retire from the ministry and your mother and I are going to sell this house and take a cruise. Away from our problems," He chuckled, "At least for a while,"

"When exactly?" I asked, wondering how his plan would change when he discovered all the secrets.

"The day after you and Sam go to your respective colleges," Eric smiled, "We are so proud of you and Sam for getting full ride scholarships to Princeton and Cambridge, even if the latter is far far far away,"

"I'll miss Sam too, but he's loved England since you and Mom let us go with Ruthie to England on one of her jobs," I pointed out, knowing what Dad was referring to.

"Simon will have moved out by then and there's really no reason to keep the house. The church might need it for something," Eric shrugged, "A reception hall or something. Besides, your mother and I had saved up enough money for you and Sam to go to college. The scholarships came as a surprise, much less full ride ones," Eric laughed, "So we are spending the money on ourselves and going to Cancun, and a few other sunny places,"

"I thought you and Mom might give me a graduation present with some of that money," I hinted, grinning, "Didn't Matt get a car?"

"And a wife, plus the other kids also got married in college," Dad reminded me

"Not Ruthie," I pointed out, smiling.

My sister was now twenty-seven, the longest a Camden had gone without getting married. Ruthie loved to travel all over the world and tell us her jetsetter stories. The kids adore her, and her gifts she finds for them for Christmas. However, she doesn't get much time to spend with her family, or to have a fulfilling relationship with a man so Mom and Dad are getting a little antsy, wanting her to settle down and them to travel around the world.

I think they're leaning toward Martin, who we all know and love. Jack would be a nice change though, because he actually seemed more interested in Ruthie, boyfriend-wise then Martin ever did. Her British stud, Chad had cheated on her apparently, but Ruthie was never around enough. The worst part was that we could all sympathize with a man that had seen my sister one day every three months. I couldn't even do that if Cain was Ruthie and I Chad. Oh Cain. Even that name makes me smile.

"I don't count Ruthie," He said, frowning, "She didn't go to college. At least Mary went to flying school or whatever that was called," He waved his hand, shrugging.

"Dad," I smiled, "Um, if Mom tells you anything,just remember," I patted him on the back, "Cookies and milk,"

"I have to go," Dad said, "Oh and tonight's Family Night, so make sure to remind your mother. Mary and Carlos wanted to tell the family something and Matt had some news," He gave me a significant look, "I'm hoping it is relevant to sugarless cookies and Annabel,"

"Die-bees!" Andrew yelled, eating another cookie. I knew he was trying to say 'diabetes' but was eating with his mouth full.

"Andrew's not terribly fond of bees," I explained to Dad with a forced grin, opening the kitchen door, "You can go now," I smiled, hopefully not showing my annoyance. How did Andrew know about the diabetes? Clever kid, sneaking around.

Like, five minutes after Dad left, Ruthie came down, wearing jogging clothes. She smiled at us, giving Andrew a hair-tousle. Andrew is the king of hair tousles on a side note, I suppose it comes with the power of being "special".

"I am going to go jogging for a while," She smiled, "Gotta work off that jet lag,"

"Speaking of jet lag," I spoke up, frowning, "Where were you?"

"Britain with Chad," She took a water out of the refrigerator, "He's on a business trip in Florida, but when he comes to L.A in three days, I'm going to have him come down here and meet the family,"

I looked at her, perplexed, "I thought you broke up with Chad?"

Ruthie frowned, "You mean Chas? Yeah, but he was Canadian and really uptight about my work schedule," She rolled her eyes, "That was five months ago, anyway. I met Chad two weeks after I dumped Chas," She giggled, "He's so cute,"

"Oh," I said, frowning. Which source had told me about Ruthie's break up with ChaD? Oh yeah, Dad. Reminder to Self: Double check Dad's sources.

"Don't worry David," Ruthie said, patting her hand on my stomach, "Chad and I have been together for four and a half months. I met his family like the week after we started dating and his kids about two months ago,"

"Kids?" I asked, "He's your age and he has more than one child?" Honestly, I feel like I have no reliable sources when it comes to Ruthie. The only person she confides in is her boyfriend and sometimes Matt. And Matt's like a stone.

"He's thirty, David," Ruthie admitted, "With three very cute boys,"

I looked at her, surprised, "I hope the oldest isn't Aaron's age?"

"Slightly older," She sighed, "But Chad was married before the kids came along, for about two years!"

"Ruthie," I laugh and she groans, and takes a seat

"Andrew, go find Grandma. I know she wants to see you!" I said in my best kid friendly voice, leading Ruthie to Andrew's seat, his sandwich now crumbs, but plenty of Oreos around.

"You can tell me anything," I told her, smiling and took an Oreo of my own.

"I love Chad," Ruthie said honestly, smiling, "He and his wife were married when they were twenty-five. They adopted Noah from Tibet first, he's five. Than Joshua came from Afghanistan. He's fifteen and then his wife got pregnant with Caleb. She died minutes after delivering him, because he was a premie,"

"Oh," I said, understanding, "So Chad isn't like Martin?"

"No, David," Ruthie whispered, "Martin will always have a part of my heart, and as much as I adore Jack Morgan, the heart I have to give away belongs to Chad, Joshua, Noah, and Caleb,"

"You know," I frowned, "Martin's coming home in a few days, permanently. From what I know, he's looking forward to spending some time with you,"

"David, it's too late," Ruthie laughed, "I stopped believing in true love a long time ago and Chad's started to show me that with work, anyone can be in love," She frowned, "Why do you want me to get with Martin? Why not give my Chad a chance?"

"Chad is, I'm sure, a wonderful guy," I said, "But, Dad has his heart set on you settling down with a nice guy close to home," I leaned in, "He and Mom are even using some of the college money that was supposed to be for Sam and I, to save up on your wedding with Martin," I explained, "And a cruise around the world," I put in as an afterthought.

"Settling down, huh?" Ruthie laughed, "David, I love Dad, but the day I choose to be married will be my choice," She grinned, "Chad proposed a week ago, actually, but I really want him to meet the family first,"

"Proposed? Does Dad know?" I asked, "You know, he has a thing about the prospective son in law asking him for his daughter's hand in marriage first," I told her, smiling

"Apparently my father and the rest of the family has confused Chad with Chas," Ruthie rolled her eyes, "Don't tell anyone. I don't want Dad and Mom to over prepare, like they do with yours and Sam's girlfriends."

I wanted so badly to scream at her that I didn't like any single girls at the moment. Notice I said _single. _ Cain was first and foremost on my mind. Speaking of Cain, what was his brother doing with a hickey on his neck, if Ruthie claimed to be taken?

"If you like Chad so much, then why did Jack have all the signs of a girl making out with him?"

"I ran into him locking lips with one of the single moms," Ruthie shrugged, "We had only talked for a few minutes, and Jen had just finished breast-feeding her twins if you get what I mean," Ruthie chuckled, "I don't understand why men are attracted to single moms or soon to be single mothers,"

"Well, technically, Martin did it with Sandy before the pregnancy happened," I pointed out, smiling

"I'm going to go jog," Ruthie said, annoyed, "You don't say a word to anyone, Mr. Camden,"

"Swear," I said, crossing my fingers, because I _have _to tell Cain. And Sam. Wow, my twin was an afterthought. This must be serious affection.


	4. Princeton

Anyway, Ruthie left and Sam came down, toting Andrew and Cherie with her little brother, Jacques and Henri. I don't even know how she got there. I certainly didn't hear her.

"Bonjour David," She said to me, brightly. I wince, because I hate the way she pronouces my name, "David," from "Dave-id" to "Da-veed." You should hear her call Sam, "Sam-u-el." It's hilarious.

"Hello Cherie," I smiled and take a sip of my milk, and add a form of greeting to the two smaller ones.

"Bonjour, David," (Same way his sister says it) Jacques said, after a brief hesitation, "C'est-"

"English, please," I interrupted, chuckling, "My French is worse than my Hebrew," I said, smiling

Jacques frowned, "Hebrew? Shalom, David, Mah slom cha?"

I laughed, "You know Hebrew, but not English?"

"Jacques knows only a little English," Cherie explained, "He's fluent in French, Spanish, Italian, Hebrew, and German, but not English. Our father has never been stationed in an all English speaking country, and I only know more, because of classes in my other schools,"

"Cherie's father is a French naval admiral," Sam explained, "He's here for the moment with her family, close by to the French Embassy,"

"Cool," I said, smiling, "Cute kids, though,"

"I like them," Andrew announced, "Listen to this!" He turned to one of them and said, "Uncle David tres gros," They all giggled and I looked at Cherie who turned a little red,

"Andrew said that his uncle is very fat," She explained and Sam laughed, "I am sorry for the boys teaching him some unsatisfactory words,"

"I also learned-" Andrew added, smiling, "Uncle Sam is a piece of Mermaid,"

"Merde," Henri corrected him, and the French bots burst into laughter. I'm no dummy, and I know what Merde means! Thank you...right? But why would Andrew say that Sam's a piece of thank you? Why is Cherie dragging them out, apologizing? Ohhh!

"So thats two fathers who don't like me and two fathers that think I'm up to something," Sam said, sitting down, smiling wanly

"Oh, Keegan came by," I told him

"I know," He said, smiling, "We're going out tomorrow. If Keegan's uncomfortable dating me, than I seriously won't attempt to continue any more of a relationship with her," Sam shrugged,

"Sam," I said, warily, standing up, shaking, "I met a boy," Why did I say that? I meant to say something regarding Keegan!

"You like him?" Sam asked

"Yeah," I admitted, smiling,

"Okay," Sam laughed and hugged me, "Will I see him in church tomorrow? I'm going with Keegan before I meet up with Lilly. What's his name? Does he go to our school?"

"Hold up, Mr. Questions," I laughed, "His name is Cain Morgan. He goes to St. Clark Prep. You know, the boys school? He lives a few houses down,"

"Jack Morgan's brother?" Sam asked, "The one that likes Ruthie?"

"No longer," I admitted, "Ruthie's involved with someone named Chad,"

"The British dude she broke up with?"

"No, Chas was the Canadian dude that cheated on her. Chad is the British dude with three kids, one of which the age she was when she fell in love with Martin," I explained in my smartass voice, even though I knew as much about Ruthie as Sam did a few hours ago.

"Never listen to Dad!" Sam smacked himself on the forehead and I laughed. We really were twins.

"Merde!" Sam muttered, taking a seat next to me, "I thought Martin was thinking about a relationship with Ruthie?" He took an Oreo and ate half of it before dunking it for the first time. I do it the opposite way. Begin with a dunk, eat half, finish off with no dunk.

"He is, according to Aaron," I said, "But then again, Aaron hasn't proved to be the most reliable source,"

"When's Martin coming exactly?" Sam asked and I had to shrug. Because I really didn't know.

"Did you hear that Mom's throwing an impromptu family dinner tomorrow night to get everyone's secrets out in the open?" Sam asked, "I'm seriously thinking of telling her mine,"

"What?" I turned so quickly, my head hurt, "Even the researching polygamy online?"

"Well, maybe not that bit," Sam admitted, "But it's not like I'm running an escort service!"

"Like Simon?" I asked

"Daddy was an escort?" Andrew asked, "What's that?"

"A person that gets paid to go out with girls," Sam explained, "Now, kiddo, you know not a word of what we discuss is to be spoken to other people,"

"Don't worry, I only tell David the secrets," Andrew took a cookie, as if to prove his point.

"Boys!" Annie came down, holding a basket of laundry, "Hello Andrew, sweetheart," She added to little Andrew, smiling, "Why don't you run along and watch some cartoons with Gregory and Thomas in the living room,"

Andrew nodded and walked over, keeping one hand supporting a wall.

"Gregory and Thomas are here?" Sam asked

"They came in a little before you and Sam," Annie set down the basket and began to fold, "We're having dinner with the Kinkirks tonight, and tomorrow night will be the family dinner. Mary's not feeling too well tonight," Mom looked practically giddy at the end

"So I heard," I said, "This wouldn't have anything to do with Martin coming home tomorrow?"

"No, I just miss seeing all my Camden children at the same table," Annie said, "You know Mary and Carlos couldn't make Thanksgiving, because Jenny and Freddie had chickenpox. Anyway, the Glasses are coming as well, along with Ben and his wife,"

Oh yes, I had almost forgotten about Ben Kinkirk's little secret. His wife, Claire, who everyone knew he really loved, despite the hold Mary had on him, had an advanced case of breast cancer. They only found out at a fertility clinic after trying to have a baby for about two years. Apparently, Claire had benign cancer her entire life, but as she grew, the cancer became less benign. Now, she only had about six months, if not less, to live her life.

I and Sam only knew, because we had needed a ride home from school and Ben didn't know Claire wanted to keep it a secret. She had sworn us to secrecy.

"Can I bring someone?" I asked, "Just a friend, Cain from down the street,"

"Nicky's older brother?" Annie asked, "Sure, I didn't know you two knew each other," Sam started to laugh/cough at that part.

"I'd like to bring a few friends too," Sam said

"Well, since it's a potluck," Annie said, frowning, "Invite their families and have them bring something. And I'll invite all the Morgans, David. Oh and maybe the girls from work! And your father's congregation could use a night out,"

I think Mom is starting to forget just why she was having a potluck dinner. Or maybe she wanted a large crowd for Mary to announce she had triplets and Carlos had gotten a high paying job that allowed him to spend as much time with his family as he wished (Not that the second part is actually true, but it could be).

"Where is this dinner again?" Sam asked

"At the church," Annie said, as if deciding that just this moment, "It'll fit everyone that I want to invite. Did you hear that the Petrowskis are back in town? I wonder how Paris, Vic, Peter, and Paige are doing."

"Well, Paris and Vic are getting their vows renewed at the same time Peter is going to marry his fiancée," I said, smiling, "I hear Paige is looking forward to being a flower girl,"

"How do you know that?" Annie asked

"They were telling Dad about it," Sam explained, "David and I walked in without realizing Dad was with someone. Peter and Grace told us,"

"Oh, everyone seems to be taken these days," Annie sighed, "At least there's still Martin,"

"Yeah," I said, "And Jack,"

"Jack's coming?" She asked

"You just told me to invite his family. Cain is Jack's younger brother," I explained, "And I think I heard from a little bird-" I smile at my mother's look of annoyance, "That Meredith is coming with Sandy and Aaron to the festivities,"

"How did you know that?" Annie asked, hand on hip, frowning.

I overheard it at church when someone was asking Sandy what she was doing tomorrow.

"Relax Mom," I said, smiling, "Meredith's involved with some guy named Connor,"

"David Joseph Camden," Ann-MOM (I keep forgetting not to call them Annie and Eric) said, "How many secrets are in that little head of yours?"

"As many recipes as you know," I said honestly, grinning.

She took an Oreo and left, huffing.

"I think we've aggravated Mom enough today," Sam said, taking another Oreo. I had to agree.

Dad was delivering a sermon on secrets. I could feel most of the congregation's eyes through the prickles of hair on my neck. Cain and I kept tapping each other's foot, exchanging secret smiles. Sam told me later that any idiot could see that I was gay with the way I acted around Cain.

We took up three rows now. As one of the youngest Camden kids, I sat up front with Sam, Ruthie, and Mom. Cain was next to me, and Keegan on the other side, holding mine and Sam's hand. I was a little afraid that Cain was jealous, but he seemed to be taking it all in stride. Particularly when my shoe pulled up his pant leg a little.

"Amen," My father finished, smiling and the congregation stood, expecting to go home, but he still stood there.

"What's he doing?" My mom hissed, worried.

"I also wish to end this beautiful day," Dad continued, smiling, "With a piece of very happy news concerning Annie and myself,"

"What's Dad doing?" Sam asked me and I looked straight at Ruthie, who had been sitting next to Jack. She shrugged.

Dad laughed, "As you can tell, my family is probably trying to figure out what I'm going to say," The congregation chuckled and we fell silent, not a buzz could be heard.

"On June first, the date which my youngest sons, Sam and David both graduate from their high school, with full ride scholarships to some nice colleges" My father looked at Sam and I smiling. I swear I could see tears falling down his cheeks, "I plan to step down as minister of Glenoak Community Church and my daughter, Lucy will take over as full time minister,"

Wait. I knew all that, but I didn't really think it was much of a secret.

"Annie and I have plans to move into Glenoak Grace Halfway Homes, so Annie can continue her work with these girls and I will have free time to attempt another novel," Dad smiled, "Perhaps this one will get published!" The congregation laughed and Dad continued.

"As for our house, which many of you may have come to think of as your second home in some point of your life, Lucy is planning to move in there with her kids and my son, Simon will move into hers and Kevin's house that they currently occupy," Dad smiled, "I look forward to being with my wife down there as a member of the congregation, looking up to my daughter. I will also try to stay involved in the church dynamic and Dr. Chandler Hampton is also coming back to help Lucy run the church,"

Wow. Dad's more ingenious then I thought. He knows that Lucy is while loved, doesn't always have the best ideas for everyone. Chandler should help her balance that out.

"Uh, there is also a potluck dinner at church tonight," Dad smiled, "It is mandatory for all Camden offspring, and we encourage the rest of you to come and bring some food! Lucy, if you will?" Dad motioned for Lucy to take the ending prayer.

Cain and I stood by the entrance of the church talking. I was thinking of that scene in _Brokeback Mountain_ where the gorgeous Ennis Del Mar grabs equally handsome Jack Twist and starts making out with him in a frenzy. I didn't want to do that with Cain. Well, I did, but I didn't want to violate his space.

"Thinking of PDA?" Cain asked, grinning and I looked at him, surprised. He laughed, "David, I have three little brothers that have that look whenever they see one of Dad's Playboys," He was sitting on the cement three foot fence that separates the stairs from the ground. His hair was blowing lightly in the wind and I sat next to him, not breaking our look.

"Gross," I mumbled, looking straight at him, he doing the same. We were leaning in, closer and closer.

Then why Gregory and Monica had to choose that moment to start fighting in front of me, I don't know. We had attracted an audience, I guess. Cain leaned back farther and sighed. I felt like killing Gregory for putting grass down Monica's dress.

Kevin came and settled their fight. I could tell that he wasn't getting a lot of sleep and he looked a little unhappy.

"How's the hotel bed, Kevin?" I asked, smiling, "I've never liked the mattresses at Holiday Inn,"

Kevin just looked at me, "Don't tell anyone, Sam,"

"I'm David," I corrected him. It was a first to be called Sam by a person that had known me since I was two.

"I'm sorry, David," Kevin sighed, "I've just been taking graveyard shifts down at the station and I'm just tired,"

"This is Cain," I said, and Cain held out his hand. I didn't realize until that moment that I didn't know just what we were.

"Friends?" Cain mumbled, "Or something more?"

"I like the title of boyfriend," I teased him, "Is that okay?"

"Call me that, but tell them first," Cain warned, "It's better to be honest then not saying anything,"

"Nice to know someone was listening to my sermon," Dad came up, smiling, "Eric Camden," He said to Cain

"Cain Morgan," He smiled, and looked at me, "David, I'll be at dinner with Jack and the family," He nodded and left.

"Poor kid," My dad said, "His family has him at this boarding school that specializes in turning same sex orientated children into heterosexuals. From what I've heard, Cain's been 'cured',"

"Really?" I asked, thinking of our footsie session

"Yes, that's why he's home. Well that and that he's planning to go to college soon after spending some time with his family,"

"He's a nice kid," I said

"Yes, and I do like his family, but not their opinions on certain subjects," Eric sighed and pat David on the shoulder, "It's nice that you're befriending him, David,"

"Yeah, nice," I croaked. Now I was afraid that Dad might treat me the same way.

The potluck dinner was just that. A mass of pots. It was set up in the yard joining Kevin's to my property. (An incident involving Thomas and Topher resulted in the fence falling down. Since then, we haven't bothered to put it back up.) Everyone was standing around laughing and kids of all ages chasing each other, screaming unintelligible words to the adult mind.

"Mom! Randy called me an egg face!" one little girl was screaming

"Mom! Monica's sitting on me again!" Another boy, Gregory, yelled. Gregory and Monica have never gotten along the most out of all of Lucy's kids. Sometimes I think that even Lucy would love to just gag both of them once in a while. What's odd is that as much as they fight with each other, they are the closest of all the kids-including the twins, Thomas and Topher.

"Greggie," Lucy pecked him on the cheek, smiling tightly, "Forgive your sister and go play with the other kids,"

Gregory scowled and walked away, unhappy at the lack of attention he was getting from Lucy. Lucy was talking to Mary, who had a slight bump that she was covering via a Glenoak Community College sweater. I also noticed that Lucy was drinking a martini and glancing at a haggard Kevin on the other side of the crowd, with guilt in her eyes.

"David," Cain smiled and I caught my breath before returning it, laughing. We sat down and Sam came by, grinning. He was sipping from a glass bottle that had the paper ripped off. Frowning, I grabbed it from him, to smell-

"Root beer, you idiot," Sam said, laughing, "I wouldn't drink right under Mom and Pop's noses," He looked at Cain, "You must be Davie's little boyfriend. I'm Sam, his smarter twin brother who has problems committing to one girl,"

"I heard about that," Cain said, "You're a pretty popular fellow at my school,"

"Oh yeah?" Sam grinned, "Davie, I like this guy,"

"Stop calling me Davie, Sammy," I warned him, "Mom's been giggling every time she sees Mary. I'm just worried about what she'll do when she discovers the multiple babies and Carlos' lack of a job,"

"Not just Mary," Sam said, "Martin too. He comes home two hours ago and Mom's practically shoving Ruthie and him at Dad,"

"Hello men," Ruthie smiled, holding the elbow of a taller fellow. Much taller, actually, being about a foot above Ruthie's lithe frame. He was holding a beer and seemed to have eyes only for her. A handsome fellow, I decided.

"'Ello mates," He greeted, showing his white teeth,

Wow. Really handsome if you count the teeth and accent. A British accent _does _make all the difference!

"This is Jean-Luc Chadley," Ruthie explained, giggling, "Just call him Chad,"

"French name, for a British man," Cain said

"That's why I go by my last," Chad said, "My British mates aren't too fond of the French crowd. Most think my parents were deranged and named me Chad Chadley. Haven't got the heart to correct the poor blokes,"

"Well, that's Sam," Ruthie explained, "He's drinking root beer right," She took his bottle from him to smell it

"Yes!" Sam said, "Has everyone but Dad and Mom caught me?"

"No, but you seem like the type," Ruthie said smiling, "Wonderful to know that my baby brother might possibly be drinking like a fish,"

"I'm watching him," I said to calm her, "I'm David, and this is my very good friend, Cain Morgan," I explained, shaking hands with the man. Firm handshake, a nice, tanned look to him. Wonder how he looks-DAVID!

"That's my boys," Chad said suddenly, pointing them out, "The tiny one throwing sand at the other tiny one is Caleb. The one running after the girl with the braids is Noah, and the one that's talking up the pretty girl is Joshua," He said frowning

"That pretty girl is actually my girlfriend," Sam said cheerfully, "Cherie and the other tiny little boy is our nephew Andrew,"

"Tiny Forrest Gump?" He asked, looking at Ruthie who nodded, chuckling at his use of words.

"David!" Someone yelled, his voice booming. That voice being all too familiar. Coach Martin.

"Trouble approaches," Cain mumbles and I cough out a laugh.

Sure enough, Martin came up, looking no worse for wear, "David, Sam-" He smiled and did a double take at Sam's drink, "Is Sam drinking?"

"Root beer," I said before Sam could make a comment about how everyone doesn't trust him.

He laughed nervously and glanced at Ruthie who only had eyes for Mr. Hottie-British-With-3-Kids.

"Oh!" I said, "Martin, this is Cain Morgan, my very good friend," I said

"How good a friend?" Sam said smiling so obviously that I kicked him in the shins. "Ow!" He mumbled and stuck his tongue out.

"And Ruthie's very good friend, Chad," I added over Sam's moans of pain. Cain and I were holding hands under the table. That was the highlight of that moment for me, even though Martin looking all awkward in front of Ruthie and almost hubby Chad and Sam groaning in pain are close seconds.

Keegan, I spotted her out of the corner of my eye. She was talking to two other girls from Sam and mine's school, laughing

"David, Sam," Mom walked up to us, smiling. Her precious Ruthie and Martin were together and as far as she was concerned, Sam and I could ruin it.

"I'm going to go talk to Cherie," Sam said, leaving. At least Sam was smart enough to know when to leave. I noticed that Ruthie and Chad were no longer holding hands.

"I'm going to check up on Joshua," Chad mumbled, walking away. Mom looked at me expectantly.

"This is Cain," I said, putting an arm over Cain. He moved his hand over to my thigh. Oh God. One...Two...Three...

"One of the Morgan boys, huh?" She asked

Four...Five...Six...

Cain nodded, "Yes ma'am. Potluck looks good,"

"Well, why don't you and David go get one of my dishes from the kitchen?" She asked, "I forgot to put it out earlier,"

Forgot, my ass.

"Sure Mom," I said, mouthing 'sorry' to Ruthie and walking away with Cain.

The kitchen was empty and against my better judgement-in my defense, the 'forgotten dish' was on the bottom shelf and Cain was leaning down, so I could see just how well his pants fit him. Sigh. Anyway, no one was around, so I took the dish from Cain and walked him against the kitchen window.

Cain, to my surprise, was _grinning_.

"I've been waiting for you to take the first step, Davie,"

"God," I said, my breath ragged all of a sudden, "If you weren't so handsome, I'd deck you for calling me Davie,"

"It's cute," Cain whispered, leaning in as well, "Just like you," And with that, our mouths crashed

Five blissful minutes passed, both of us equally into this heavy make-out session. Cain was waving his hands through my hair and my hands were somewhere on his back and lower-well you get my point.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" Came from the door. Cain and I both jumped to separate sides of the room, freaked out. The person who had discovered us-

"Keegan," I mumbled, looking down. Cain was as well.

Keegan was looking down too, "Oh. I'll just go," She walked away and for some reason, I felt a urging to go get her,"

"She is cute," Cain said, playing with my hair, "Maybe I'll have to rethink this whole bisexual thing,"

"I like you just the way you are," I said, smiling

"David," Cain kissed me on the cheek, "I think you owe it to yourself to at least explain everything to her,"

"Everything everything?" I asked

"No," He said, "Just with you,"

"Fine," I sighed, "She's cute huh?"

"Definite potential," Cain agreed, laughing, "If it makes you feel better, my family doesn't know that I've suffered a relapse and gone back to being gay. Well, except Jack,"

"Why are you so cute?" I said, smiling, "Let's get out of here before I lose my sanity again,"

Keegan was talking to Sam. When she spotted me, she looked at Sam, said something and then kissed him. I saw that Mom was watching as well as a great deal of other people who had aww-ed over naked baby pictures of Sam and me in the tub.

When the blatant make out ended, as a sort of showing to me at where I now stood, everyone clapped and Sam turned a deep cherry red. I could see the other girls in the background growing horns and glaring at Keegan.

I walked over, nonetheless. Sam seemed a little out of it.

"David," He grinned, "That girl knows how to make a man feel go-_ood_!"

"Come with me, Sam," Cain said, laughing, "I'll get you a nice cold water,"

They walked away and Keegan looked down again.

"Decided not to tell him, huh?" I asked

"Not like I have a chance with the cuter twin," She said, looking at me, "I really thought I felt something between us, David,"

"I'm not gay," I said softly and she laughed

"I'd hate to see your idea of gay,"

"I'm batting for both sides," I said in the same hushed tone, "Bisexual, I think is the more understood term,"

"Oh," She nodded, "So he's-" She looked at him

"Gay, yeah," I said, smiling, "Doesn't mind my quirks, but his one fault is that he does go to school so far away. And he's going to college here, while I'm at Princeton,"

"Princeton?" Keegan asked, "I got accepted into Princeton. Don't know if I'll go,"

"Another offer?" I asked

She nodded, "Stanford and NYU,"

I nodded, "For what it's worth, Keegan," I said, "I hope you pick the right college for you,"

"Me too," She said, looking at me, "David, let's always be friends, yeah?"

"Friends," I smiled and hugged her, giving Cain the thumbs-up.

"Everyone! Everyone!" Annie yelled, jumping up and down in joy, "Mary and Carlos have some news!"


	5. No More Secrets

Carlos smiled, standing up, holding Mary's hand, "My grandfather, Miguel, he is passed away,"

Everyone, of course, expresses their regrets with notes of ohs and aws

"He leaves me a good deal of money and Eric find me a job!" Carlos smiled, "Maria and I will have our own home again!"

Mary nodded, squeezing his hand. Everyone clapped, cheering.

"Wonderful news!" Annie said, "Anything else?" She asked

My god, that woman is hard up for grandchildren. She works at a halfway house full of babies and all her grandkids are practically babies. When will it be enough for her?

"Annie," Eric said, in an attempt to settle her down. Poor Dad doesn't seem to realize the lack of restraint he has when Mom really wants something.

"That is it," Carlos said, confused, sitting down,

"What about the baby?" Annie blurted out

"DAVID!" Mary screamed,

"It wasn't me!" I yelled and everyone chuckled,

"Baby?" Carlos asked, "What is Annie talking about, Maria?"

Mary bit her lip, "I'm afraid that I'm eating for four, Carlos,"

"What?" He asked

"Two boys and a girl, all fraternal," She continued, "I like Eddie, Bobby, and Jamie for names,"

Carlos sighed, "I need some vodka. Lots of vodka,"

"Me too," Annie said, sitting down, "Triplets? Oh my-Are you sure, Mary?"

"As sure as Carlos wants that vodka,"

"Mom, I have news too," Lucy said, bringing Kevin front and center. Oh great.

"More babies?" Annie asked, her face lighting up

"No," Lucy laughed, "No, no, no-"

"What she means to say is that we are very happy with our six and want to keep it to six," Kevin said, smiling slightly. First smile of the evening.

"Kevin and I just told the kids a few days ago," Lucy said softly, playing with a thread on her sweater

"And?" Annie asked, confused, "Is Savannah skipping another grade?"

"No," Lucy said, glancing at Savannah, who was holding Jacob on her lap, trying not to cry and failing.

"Lucy and I are separating, and we're discussing a possible divorce," Kevin said, speaking when Lucy's voice died out

"What?" Annie stood up, "Why?"

"That's between Kevin and myself," Lucy said softly, "And we are going to go now," She added

"Wait!" Matt yelled standing up, Annabel front and center, "If this is the night to shed secrets, Annabel might as well say hers,"

"You are anorexic!" Annie declared

"No!" Matt was shocked, "Mom!" He yelled and rolled his eyes, "Annabel, sweetie?" He asked

Annabel looked up, directly into my face, "I have diabetes," She said softly, "Type 1,"

"Oh!" Annie looked so confused, unsure of which couple to hug, or to pray to God for better times.

Cain glanced at me and mouthed, "now?"

I shook my head

"Simon?" Annie asked, hoping for better news from him

Simon sighed, "This might be the last time any of you good folks get to see my boy," He nodded over to Andrew, who was still playing with the other boy-Caleb, unaware of the attention. "Cecilia won full custody and I only have weekly visitation rights. Looks like that car chase came to bite me in the ass," He said softly

Annie sunk down to a chair and I could see Dad's face getting paler. Sweat was coming down his forehead.

"Dad, Mom," Ruthie came out of nowhere with Chad and his kids, "I know this isn't the best time, but this is my fiance Chad and his kids, Joshua, Noah, and Caleb," She said in a burst. I wondered briefly how it felt to rip off that Band-Aid and just tell them.

Dad's breathing looked a little short too. Frowning, I quickly led him to the car, all the other guests now in a clamor, trying to comfort everyone at once. Dad gave me a weary look and rasped out,

"David, I think it's happening,"

"I'm going to the hospital," I told him, putting him in the car and starting the engine. Cain had popped up from the back and was waving us away. I knew Cain would take care of our leave until we actually needed the family.

I've always hated the hospital. Well, not always. When I was nine years old, Sam and I had been climbing up this giant tree at our school during recess. It had been a dare and I was afraid of heights. About twenty or so feet from the ground, I looked down and promptly fell off. I crashed to the ground, unconscious and my arm shattered into four pieces. Sam, I was told later, shimmied down. Neither of us have gone near a tree since.

Anyway, my least favorite teacher, Miss Wandheim, had to escort me to Glenoak hospital. I was basically lectured the entire time about climbing a tree. My least favorite part though, was when we were waiting in the emergency room and there were all these druggies, bleeding people, kids with broken arms like me, and doctors were just walking around.

I was treated right away though, because my father was Eric Camden, a man who had helped the hospital in hard times and liked to visit the patients.

"Reverend!" A woman I didn't know in scrubs came toward us, smiling, "Missed the patients already?"

"My son, Sam," Eric said, leaning on my shoulder

"I'm David, Dad," I corrected, frowning, "Nurse, my dad has a history of heart attacks. His last one was about five months ago, and I'm worried that he's going to have another one,"

She took a closer look at him and checked his stats. Frowning, she sighed,

"You seemed much better earlier, Reverend. We better get you in a bed and a doctor to treat you-again," She looked at me, smiling, "You did the right thing, David. His heart seems like it's undergoing a good deal of stress,"

"It is," I assured her, "Everyone chose the same day to tell him their news,"

"Not good news?" She asked

"Try five pieces of different bad news," I told her, "And he hasn't even heard about Sam's multiple girlfriends!"

"What?" Eric rasped, standing up straighter and frowned, "Da...vid...Jo...seph...Cam...den," Dad seemed to be slowing down and gripping his left arm. The nurse frowned and yelled for a crash cart.

Two hours later, my father was in a coma. I was sitting in his room, tears washing over my face. I hadn't bothered to call anyone about the fact that Dad was going to have to go through a triple bypass. And that was only if he pulled out of this coma. Cain had called me, and I told him everything.

He was going to come tomorrow. Other people were calling me, and Dad's cell was vibrating constantly. I could see that most of the calls were from Mom. The people calling me were mostly Sam and Mom. I was going to have a hell of a lot of voice mails tomorrow. For now, I decided to shut off both phones.

Walking in the hallways, I saw old men and woman undergoing dialysis, getting ready for bed, exchanging jokes with each other as if this was just some sort of elderly sleepaway camp. A kid around my age was sitting on one of these chairs crying. I sat down, looking at him.

He glanced at me and sighed, wiping away his tears. At least until he saw that I had tears of my own. Then we sort of reached a mutual bond to cry.

"Your dad too?" I asked

"Grandfather," He corrected me, "My folks died young, so he's been raising me. Just discovered Parkingson's," He looked at me

"My dad," I said, sighing, "Fourth heart attack. He had the first when I was a baby,"

"Damn," The boy said, sighing, "I'm Keith,"

"David," I told him softly, "Seventeen, you?"

"Nineteen," He smiled bitterly, "That old man was the only family I had left for a long time,"

"I have a family," I told him, "A meddling mother, two older brothers, three sisters and my twin brother, not to mention the cousins and aunts and uncles, and grandparents," I said

"Why the hell are you wasting time with me?" He asked, "You should be with your family, praying for your dad to live,"

I raised my eyebrow, "My family is the reason why Dad chose today to have another heart attack. My sister was just telling him that she was marrying another man with three kids instead of the man he and my mother have wanted for her since forever,"

"So? Sisters are still worried about their father's whereabouts," He told me

"My twin is dating three girls at once. He's very serious with all of them and they all know. My dad does now, as well, thanks to my big mouth,"

"You should call that twin," He said kindly, "Tell him that you told your father his news that spiraled into a heart attack,"

"What a wonderful way to put it," We both laughed, despite the situation.

"I still have to tell dear old Dad that I'm a bisexual, on top of it all,"

"I'm straight," Keith told me, off the bat, "Just in case this was your idea of flirting,"

"I'd be a pretty crappy flirter then," I laughed, smiling

"David, I'd tell them one at a time," Keith told me gently

"Keith Washington?" A nurse called, "John Wells is awake and asking after you," She told him kindly, "And are you David?" She asked me, "Reverend Camden's boy?"

"Reverend?" Keith said, "I see where you might get screwed, David," We both laughed weakly and Keith walked off. The nurse looked at me, waiting for confirmation, I guess.

"David Camden, yeah," I said

"Can you fill these out?" She asked, "We have most of his information, but these are just insurance things,"

I nodded and looked at the forms. God. I hate forms. You would too, after dealing with college forms, graduation forms, insurance forms, all these pain in the ass forms.

With that, I decided to take Keith's advice, tell 'em once at a time.

I dialed Simon. Why Simon, I don't know. He answered his cell and I said,

"Are you alone?"

"David?" Simon said, "Is that you?"

"David!" My mother. There was some noise and her voice filled the line, "David Joseph Camden, where are you!"

I hung up, hoping Simon would get the message. Five minutes later, I dialed again.

"Hello?" He said, a hint of nerves in his voice

"Are you alone?" I asked, honing my ear for background noises

"Uh, ye-yes," He said, "David, where are you and Dad? Everyone's getting really worried,"

"Simon, listen to me," I told him, "You can't tell anyone where you are going unless you want them to get hurt," That part was a load of bull, but I wanted to scare Simon enough into coming without anyone behind him. He tended to be a hero of sorts.

"Okay," He said, "Detective Michaels is here, you know," He said

"Don't tell anyone, Simon," I said again, "Tell Sam the apple runs to the creek and to bring you with him, in Reese pieces seven," I sighed, deciding to rely on twin code words. Sam and I had invented these when we were ten or so. We used them habitually, but I knew Sam knew what _apple runs to the creek in Reese pieces seven _meant.

Quietly run to the hospital in an hour and seven minutes.

Sure enough, I spotted Sam, who was loyal to the twin codes. He walked up with Simon next to him, both of them well and alone.

"David!" He greeted me laughing, like nothing had happened. Simon seemed grimmer,

"David, what happened?" He asked, "Sam and I crawled through bushes and ran all the way here,"

"You could've driven, you ass," I told Sam,

"Wanted to make sure," Sam shrugged, "My cell's at home and sos Simon's. Mom thinks I'm in my room and Simon's in the bathroom, so no one's followed us,"

I nodded, "Dad had another heart attack,"

Simon turned white and Sam swore.

"Damn it, David, why didn't you just tell Mom?" He asked, "She thinks that you two were kidnapped or something!"

"I don't want to excite our father again," I told him, worn, "Mom's just going to coddle him and the man's in a coma. Give him some respect. He should be out of it in a day though,"

"Why me?" Simon asked, "Sam, I get, but why me?"

"I haven't told Mom and Dad my news," I said, looking him square in the eye, "And Sam, I may have accidentally told Dad about your three girlfriends,"

"Actually," Sam grinned, "I broke up with Lilly. Cherie's moving again, and Mandy dumped me for another boy," He shrugged, "That leaves Keegan. Just one girl for me,"

"Dad'll be happy to hear that," I smiled, "He liked Keegan,"

"Three girlfriends?" Simon asked

"It was fun," Sam told him, smiling, "But I'm going to go for the committing to one girl thing. Plus Keegan's one hell of an amazing kisser,"

"And what's David's news?" Simon asked

I looked at him thoughtfully, "I have a boyfriend. Cain Morgan from down the street,"

Simon nodded, looking down, "So you're gay then?"

"Bi," I told him, "Don't know how Dad'll handle it,"

"Dad, is he okay?" Simon asked

"After the coma comes a triple bypass," I told him, "You know what the odds are on triple bypass?"

Simon let loose a swearword that I'd rather not print. Sam hugged me tightly, and I saw that my twin was also crying.

"I love you, Sam," I told him softly and he said the same to me.

"My brothers, everyone," Simon sighed and hugged me tightly too, "I'd like to meet Cain," He told me, looking at the floor, "I bet he's a good guy,"

"One of the best," I told him, smiling, "Dad's in there. I'm going to go call Matt,"

"Matt's at home too," Simon said softly, "Everyone's in the kitchen with their phones on, calling us,"

"Dad's voice-mail is already full," I said, "I was listening to threats that Mom was making,"

"She stopped after the fifth glass of wine," Simon said thoughtfully, "Now she's more sober, and probably eying the phone like a hawk,"

I nodded and pulled out my cell, "I have to call Matt, tell him everything,"

"We're going to visit Dad," Sam said, clapping me on the shoulder

"Hello?" That was Matt's rough voice, "Snuggles, I have to stay, for a little while longer, I'm sorry,"

"Snuggles?" I asked, smiling in spite of myself, "Cute nickname, Matt,"

"David?" Matt said, surprised. I could hear people scuffling all around him, "Where's Simon and Sam?"

"With me and Dad," I told him, "Can I have Ruthie?" I asked thoughtfully

The phone was tossed over and I could hear Mom in the background talking about ways she was going to punish Dad and I for scaring her.

"David?" Ruthie asked, her voice calming me down, "Hey kid, where are you?"

"Ruthie, I want you to come in about a half hour with Matt. Don't let anyone follow you. Not even Detective Michaels,"

"David, I don't-" Ruthie said weakly

"Is Chad there?" I asked, wondering

"No, he had to go to the hotel with the boys," She said, "They were getting tired,"

"Martin's next to you, right?" I asked, "Probably listening in. Hi Martin!"

Nothing came until a few seconds later when I was greeted with a, "David,"

"Bring Matt and Martin, I suppose," I said softly, "Pretend you're leaving or something. Come to the place where I saw the almost dead. And trust me, Ruthie,"

No one but Ruthie would know that. We had a discussion about it a while ago.

I hung up, even though Ruthie was still questioning. Forty five minutes later, I saw her, Matt, and Martin. Matt looked as if he was going to fry me alive.

"David!" He yelled, "Mom's out of her mind, screaming at everyone about all these ridiculous codes,"

"She'll live," I said, "Mom needs some sleep," I took a deep breath, "Dad had another heart attack and he's currently in a coma,"

"No," Ruthie sighed, "Because of me?"

"More of a factor of all the secrets he heard at once," I said softly, "Dad needs triple bypass surgery,"

"Whoa," Martin sighed, sitting down

"I still have to tell him that his youngest son is gay," I said simply, "And has a hot boyfriend,"

"Cain?" Ruthie asked, smiling, "He's cute,"

I blush a little, "I know,"

"What?" Matt said, bewildered

"I do like girls though," I told them, "So I guess I'm bisexual, but right now, I'm with Cain,"

"Right on," Martin said, unsure of what to say

Ruthie hugged me, crying, "Oh David," She sighed, "You're telling all of us?"

"One at a time," I said softly, "Mom's last, because well," I sighed, "I just don't know if I can tell her,"

"Mary and Lucy probably won't like being last to know," Ruthie said, chuckling

"I was actually going to call Mary and Mom up, let Lucy be the last and see if she'll complain about that,"

"Careful with Lucy, David," Matt said gently, "She and Kevin are going through a hard time,"

"She should have never invited Chandler back," I said simply, "That's where it all went wrong,"

"Huh?" Ruthie asked

"Kevin walked in on Lucy and Chandler during a inopportune moment, so to speak," I said, "She does love Kevin though,"

"Our family is screwed up," Matt said, laughing, "How the hell do you know about all these secrets?"

"Our sister taught Sam and myself," I said, shrugging. Ruthie laughed and pecked me on the cheek.

"Lots of luck to you, David. Where's Daddy?"

I nodded to his room number-172 and Ruthie went there, followed by Matt. Martin stayed where he was, hands shoved into his pockets. I clapped a hand on his shoulder,

"Martin, while you're here, you should know that I make good friends with little kids. Such as Ruthie's boytoy's kids,"

Martin nodded, not liking the boytoy reference I made to Chad.

"Seems that Ruthie's love of her life has a few loves of his life in Britain," I said, chuckling, "They should break up in about three days and I expect you to swoop in and save her,"

Martin grinned and nodded.

"You are a good man, David Camden," He told me

"I know," I smiled and walked away, with my cell in hand,

Mom picked up on the first ring.

"David?" She asked, sounding like a worried mother and not one out to get me.

"I love you, Mom," I told her softly

"That bad?" She asked

"Bring Mary. No one else and I mean it Mom." I said softly, "Dad wouldn't want it. Come by whenever, but make sure only Mary's with you,"

"What about Lucy and Kevin and Detective?" She asked, concerned

"Let me talk to the Detective," I said, sighing

"David," He said, all-business.

"Go home. It's not an emergency situation," I said kindly, "If you'll notice, I'm recruiting Mom and Mary to leave next. That leaves Lucy and Kevin alone together, and they need to talk,"

"I see your point, son," He said, smiling. I could tell he was smiling.

"Tell Mom secretly that Dad's at the hospital. He had another heart attack. In a coma right now, but scheduled for a triple bypass, should he wake up,"

"I'll come by in the morning too," He said, and we both hung up.

Mom came running down with Mary trailing her. How they had managed to leave Lucy's claws, I wondered.

"David!" Mom hugged me, "Oh don't ever scare me like that," She said, angry and relieved at the same time, "Ever again!"

"I love you, Mom," I said, laughing,

"Michaels just left as well," Mary said, laughing. "Said that he had another case come up,"

"How'd you guys get out?" I asked

"I said that I was going to look for you and Mary said she had to leave early in the morning," Mom explained, "Lucy and Kevin are alone in the kitchen waiting for you to call,"

"Hopefully talking," I said, "Look Mary, Mom," I breathed a sigh, "I have a boyfriend. He's the greatest and I like him a lot. Maybe even love him someday," I shrugged, "I don't know,"

"David," Mary sighed, "Congratulations, I guess,"

"And I didn't say anything about the triplets," I added, "Sam made a comment and Mom overheard,"

"I've made my peace with that," Mary said gently, "I love you, David," She walked to Dad's room and I was left with my mother.

Mom is possibly the most fearless person I've ever met, but at that moment, she seemed like a sheet. I could just tip her over with one poke.

"David Joseph Camden," She said kissing me on the cheek, "How times do change,"

"You're okay with this?" I asked

"As long as I meet the boy and I like the boy," she said, "Meaning, if the boy is not like Rose,"

I laughed. We have a lot of inside jokes for Rose. We do like Rose, but Simon and Rose, how they ever got together, no one knows.

"You'll like him," I assured her, "He's the greatest guy I've ever met," I added honestly

"I'm sure he is," Mom said and walked in to see Dad with me. Everyone was there, looking at him. Dad, I could see, was also awake now. When he saw Mom, he literally lit up.

"My Annie," He croaked, "How I love you,"

"Oh Eric!" Annie said and ran over, half afraid to touch him, and half afraid not to touch him.

"David," Keith looked at me, smiling, "Turned out to be a mix-up. All he's got is a concussion from falling down a ladder," He laughed

"They know," I said, smiling, "Thanks man," We shook hands and left.

"Is that the boy?" Annie asked

"No, he's straight," I said, chuckling, "Cain's cuter,"

"Who's Cain?" Dad asked

Everyone glanced at me, half worried for Dad's heart. I sighed,

"Cain is the boy that I wanna date," I said, getting it over with

Dad, to my surprise, _smiled_.

"The boy I saw you kissing in the kitchen?"

"Dad?" I said, confused, "You know?"

"You're my son, David," He said smiling, "I make it a point to know everything. And you should know that Bryan is a bigger fan of Oreos then you think,"

I laughed, and kissed him on the cheek, "I forgot that I told him," I frowned, "So, Dad, you knew everything?"

He nodded, sighing, "Where do you think that you and Ruthie inherited the spy gene from?" He smiled

"So, why the heart attack?" Mom asked, holding his hand confused, "If you already knew everything-"

"I didn't know about Ruthie and Sam," Dad said softly, "And Simon,"

"Dad," Simon sighed, "Cecilia's talking about joint custody. She feels bad about the heart attack,"

"And Daddy," Ruthie spoke up, "Chad and I decided to end things amicably. He was worried that he had something to do with your heart. It was really just a fling,"

I could see Martin looking at her, smiling.

"Also, everyone should know that I now only have one girlfriend," Sam said, smiling,

"I'm having a talk with you about the polygamy," Dad said, frowning

"Polygamy?" mom repeated, "Sam?"

"After the surgery, Reverend," The doctor came in, grinning,

"Surgery?" Eric asked

"Triple bypass," I explained

"David, Sam, Ruthie, Simon, Lucy, Mary, Matt," Dad said, and looked up, smiling, "Annie," He added, "How I love all of you and your families, no matter what should happen,"

"We're praying for you, Eric," Annie assured him, kissing her dear husband of years on the cheek. She dropped a few tears as he was wheeled out. I look out the window and smile. The sun is shining for the first time since this week started. Before, it was mostly rain and clouds.

This week, for the first time, most of the secrets are out.


	6. Epilogue

Andrew is now an active eight year old, toddling around on crutches. He loves helping Baby Mona walk and Cecilia is yet again pregnant-with Simon's definite son. They are possibly the happiest little family I know. How Simon and Cecilia ever managed to rekindle a romance, renew vows, and deal with Andrew's sudden relapse, I'll always admire them for.

Annabel is still one of the strongest little girls that I've ever met. She's now fourteen and has a boyfriend. Probably she'll get another one and another one, just like her Uncle Sam. However, being smart and cunning, unlike Sam, she'll be bright enough to dump them for the love of her life instead of her brother's life.

Sam, my dear twin brother. He and Keegan dated briefly for three weeks. He said that it was more of a mutual break up, meaning that she walked in on him kissing a girl, with a boy behind her, ready to "do the dirty". Now Sam is in his junior year at Cambridge and his girl, Jeanna Bradley, has managed to capture his heart and keep it. I'm no judge, but two years is good, and nothing if not a record when it comes to Sam.

Ruthie ended up dating Martin. I was the best man at the wedding, for Martin said that if it hadn't been for David, he would've just left the hospital. Ruthie's smile is so dazzling now, that I often wonder how she lived before Martin. They have a little girl, Annie-Kate Brewer and she also bears the honor of being my godchild. Cute little girl with Mom's curls and Dad's black hair. All my friends are starting to get tired of my endless rants on little Annie-Kate. How Annie-Kate knows how to operate the remote, how she likes to dance to old Beatles tunes, and how she's looking forward to her little sister being born.

Savannah is at college now, her first year at Julliard. She writes often and phones less. From what I hear, she loves dancing more then ever. Savannah was always full of dreams. Monica and Gregory have developed into teenagers and they seem only to fight more now. Gregory's in love with every girl that comes his way with a nice pair of legs and Monica rents movies with Heath Ledger or some other hot Aussie/accented actor as the star. I've started to spend more time with Monica on her Movie Nights. If it wasn't for Annie-Kate, Monica would probably be my (secret) favorite.

Thomas and Topher are where Sam and I were, years ago, in high school. Same age and everything. I don't think that they are dealing with the same problems as us, though. At least I hope not. Thomas, I bet would be the one like me, although Topher and Sam are worlds apart. After all, Topher has ONE high school sweetheart and he's smitten with her. Mom's even humming Here Comes the Bride again everytime she spots Topher and the lovely Julianne.

And Jacob. Sweet naïve Jacob. He is now a ten year old and no longer the whining baby of the Camdens, with Andrew and Freddy now more accessible for him to play with. Not to mention the fact that he's finally learned the advantages of being baby of the family. Sam was right, we just needed to spend an hour with Jacob for him to catch on.

It turned out to be nothing but a major pregnancy mix-up with Mary and Carlos. Mary _was_ pregnant, but not with triplets. Just with Annie Beth. Carlos, I think, was the most relieved when he heard that. I'm _positive_ that I saw Mom's face fall. Turns out she was looking forward to more grandkids. She's starting to eye Sam's Jeanna and don't get me started on Topher's Julianne. Great grandkids. Ugh.

Dad is taking it easy now. He and Mom did go on their little cruise, but Lucy made them stay in the church house for another year. Dad and Mom do live in the top floor of the halfway house now though. Most of the time, Mom does make Dad sleep in his old room, which Lucy has saved just for him. Dad doesn't mind all that much and devotes his time to gardening and playing with his grandchildren. If someone needs help though, well retirement's not going to stop Dad from trying to play therapy with them.

Lucy and Kevin never divorced. They're reconciling, meeting with marriage counselors and talking. Nothing has really been done. From what I know, Kevin lives in the garage apartment and Lucy in her old attic bed. I still see Kevin sneaking looks at Lucy and smiling slightly and vice versa.

As for my venture into men? Cain and I dated for a year, but broke it off. We were in love with the other, but his family had problems with me and mine was uncomfortable with it as well. Cain and I both knew that in our relationships, our families had to come first. He lives in an apartment place with two of his brothers now and we agreed to be friends.

As for me?

Keegan chose Princeton. And you can guess what happened after that.

"David?" Keegan was leaning against the doorframe, smiling. She was wearing my blue button down shirt and her underwear with the teddy bear pattern that I like to tease her about, but secretly think of as sexy. She was smiling and I think that I'm just even more in love with her now, "We're out of toilet paper," She told me, giggling, "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because," I grinned lazily, "I was just wondering what a girl like you would say to being married to a boy like me?"

"I don't know," She teased back, "Depends on the ring, I suppose,"

"Would this do it for you?" I asked, holding out the ring. I had been playing with it for three weeks, trying to decide what was the right time to ask her something like that. This, I decided, was a good time.

She gasped and took the ring from me.

"Oh David," Keegan whispered, "It's beautiful,"

"It's yours whether you say yes or no," I told her, "Although you should know, that if you say yes, I'll buy you all the toilet paper you need,"

She laughed, "Yes, I'll be Mrs. David Camden," She kissed me, "And get toilet paper later. I need you to dial everyone we know for me while I see how many carats this is," She looked at the ring excitedly, giggling.

Of course, I still have a good chunk of secrets left lying around. What are they? Well that's a story for a different time. For now:

My name is David Camden and I am happily in love.


End file.
